One Liners Jokes
Best resource of jokes on WWW

Going on a trip this summer? Plaster one of these bumper stickers on your car and see how many laughs you get. (Come to think of it, with the price of gas, it might be better to forget the car, travel by foot and stick one of these on your bumper!)

1. Horn doesn't work. Watch for finger.

2. Cover me. I’m changing lanes.

3. My brother is the CEO of a large bumper sticker manufacturing company, but all I got was this lousy bumper sticker.

4. I brake for no apparent reason.

5. I’m not as think as you drunk I am.

6. Forget about World Peace. Visualize using your turn signal.

7. We have enough youth. How about a fountain of Smart?

8. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

9. Forget the Joneses. I keep up with the Simpsons.

10. Sometimes I wake up grumpy. Other times I let him sleep.

11. When you do a good deed, get a receipt in case Heaven is like the IRS.

12. Real women don’t have hot flashes, they have power surges.

13. Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.

14. Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.

15. If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

16. Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

17. Sure it's an old heap, but wait 'til you see what I got under the hood!

18. Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

19. I’m just driving this way to make you mad because I'm bored.

20. We’re not in jail, and I’m not your @#$%&, so get off my ass!