Alpha: Software undergoes alpha testing as a first step in getting user feedback. Alpha is Latin for "doesn't work."

Beta: Software undergoes beta testing shortly before it's released. Beta is Latin for "still doesn't work."

Error message: Terse, baffling remark used by programmers to place blame on users for the program's shortcomings.

Reference Manual: Object that raises the monitor to eye level. Also used to compensate for that short table leg.

Help: The feature that assists in generating more questions. When the help feature is used correctly, users are able to navigate through a series of Help screens and end up where they started from without learning anything.

User-Friendly: Of or pertaining to any feature, device or concept that makes perfect sense to a programmer.

- Novice Users: People who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer.

- Intermediate Users: People who don't know how to fix their computer after they've just pressed a key that broke it.

- Expert Users: People who break other people's computers.